I was doing some personality tests online and came across Visual DNA. Cool stuff!



I really like their analysis about me, especially this sentence:
You like life rough and rugged around the edges...

Wonderful how a few words can sum up what I feel about life.

I love notebooks and organisers. I love writing in them, seeing my words confined in something that reflects the content of my writing.

For school, I use hard-cover notebooks with clean lines, because I like to feel neat and organised. For doodling I like funky covers with plain pages; they make my creative cells multiply. For secretive thoughts I like plain, soft-covered ones, especially those made of leather with yellowed pages.

I found this wonderful website selling leather journals. They have my favourite medival journals, and even a Book of Shadows (reminds me so much of Charmed). I can imagine myself penning poem after poem on these pretty books.

Too bad, I can't afford them. Ah. Let me continue dreaming.

I have now alot of time on my hands. And a disgusting shade of fair skin. In the past couple of days I went down to the pool to get some tanning done. I swear, the sun hates me. We're forever playing hide-and-seek with each other. When it's bright and sunny, I rush down to the pool. Just when I get there, it hides behind the clouds. Grrr.

So I ended up tanning without the sun:


After a while I got sick of it so I swam. When I was done, the lovely sun came out to play. Yay! I managed to get some tanning done after all.

Went back home, pulled out the rubber band from my chlorinated hair, and realized I have nice, wavy hair.


I think wavy hair would be nice change, am considering getting it done. What do you think?

I've been having good sleep lately. And when I mean good, I mean really good.

Dreamless, uninterrupted sleep. No backaches when I wake. No splitting headaches. And most importantly, I wake up HAPPY. Like, chirpy happy. Like the-day-is-so-beautiful-and I'm-going-to-strike-4D-whole-year-long kinda happy.

The last time I had such fruitful sleep, was... at Qiaoyun and the Goonfather's ROM.
We had spent a long night decorating the house. I was cutting ribbons into 'Double Happiness' and fake flowers, wrestling with Blu-tacks and blowing up huge balloons the night before.

So when the Big Day came, I was so exhausted after the guests left that I fell asleep on their purple "Just Married" comforter. That was the best two hours of my sleeping history.

The person who woke me up was none other than the Goonfather himself. He burst in through the door and started making a fuss about me sleeping on their marital bed. Something about bad luck and not being able to ever get married and he doesn't want his sister to be unmarried all her life. He's rather superstitious because he thinks it's better to believe than not to. Like, pray to as many gods as possible instead of sticking to one.. something along those lines.
Anyway, we had to go out, and that was the end. I've never slept well since.

And now, approximately a year later, I'm having great sleep again! How cool is that? Does that mean the gods have forgiven me and I will get married after all?

Not exactly the way I want it to be over, but still, it's over.

I got the worst seat number ever. It's jinxed. It means, 'Want to die lah, want to die lah'.

I feel that this day is just like my Valentine's Day or Mother's Day. I'm not big on celebrating them but sometimes I just force myself to get into the mood because well, people come up with these holidays for a reason.

So, I'm not exactly exhilarated, but for the sake of it, I'M FREE! Yay!

Great. I locked myself at home again by leaving my keys somewhere I don't remember or know about. When is this going to ever stop?!?!

Annnd, my last paper is just tomorrow. I'm not fully prepared and I have to get to where my notes are! But then again, I'm never fully prepared for qualitative papers - I don't like my answers to sound off-the-books and just like the other 2000 candidates. I like improvision. Still, this is nuts. My notes and I are separated by just one lousy key.

Maybe it's just the Study God's way of telling me to relax. What a joke... that's what I've been doing all the while.

The frenzy over the Soci paper I took made it to the papers.

Excerpt:
SOME 1,800 students who took an external degree examination on Tuesday are in dismay...They had prepared themselves thoroughly for a topic which they had been told was certain to appear in one section of their paper.However, that topic was missing from the exam paper...

The three-hour exam consisted of three sections with eight questions in all. The first two sections, A and B, consisted of a single compulsory question each. Section A is worth 50 marks and Section B, 25 marks. Section C, worth 25 marks, offers students the choice of attempting one out of six questions, each covering a separate topic.

The six topics are Gender; Race and Ethnicity; Social Inequalities and Social Injustice; Religion and Society; Power in Society; and Sociology of Organisation. Students from both schools were prepped for only one topic: Sociology of Organisation.

However, Tuesday's paper offered only four questions for Section C, instead of the expected six. To the students' horror, one of the two questions missing was the one they had spent the entire year preparing for.

I know of classmates who raised their hands to ask if they were sitting for the correct paper, some had questions about the paper and most of them left halfway through the exam.

Me? I sat through it and attempted Power in Society, producing only two vague paragraphs. The thought of quitting didn't appeal to me.

Ah Hao told me that he actually has a friend who is gloating over the paper mix-up. Apparently, that friend thinks that it would work out so well for him, because he dedicated his full 3 hours to the whole of Section A and B and produced quality answers to Section A and B. I quote, "I'm not so stupid to attempt Section C like the rest of the people because it's obviously their (UOL) fault."

Seriously, I don't think he was very clever. Right now I just feel sorry for the poor souls (and me) who attempted Section C anyway because we were born to try.

I wonder how they are going to moderate this, because it's obviously going to be extremely unfair. There are some people who banked on their essays and there's no way their lousy performance in short-ended questions is going to be of any comfort.

Of course, I'm just talking about me.

It's about TWO more hours to that dreaded Soci exam!
And about ONE more hour to me turning into a nervous wreck.

Theorists, theories and more theories are swimming about in my head right now. I can only hope they don't dissolve when I need them. Or, if they do, I can only hope that I apply the Garbage Can Model -- that is, desperately picking out solutions that are floating around as a last resort -- when the time comes.

Not to fear!
FIVE more hours to getting that huge load off my chest.

Anyone interested in partying with me?

UPDATE: I ended up using the Garbage Can Model alot. =(

I love being in denial.
Today's paper sucked. I used to brag about myself being the Math Genius, but I watched as my First Class grades fly away as I attempted those stupid sums.

It's okay. I'm in denial.

Moby - Dream About Me
Babe
Oh, dream about me
Lie
On the phone to me

Tell me no truth
If it hurts bad
There's enough in my life
To make me so sad

Once upon a time, in a JC in Bedok South, our little close-knitted class had to let go a few members because they didn't fare too well in the 'O' Levels. One of them was our cheery Class Clown/Joker, Raj.

Being the innocent and naive us, we thought we could stop his departure just by our passion. Our love and passion for something we believed in. So, we wrote a petition letter. I kept it because I was really upset at that time, and I just wanted to keep everything about Raj close to me.

After time passed, we stopped being sad. We remembered Raj fondly but instead of crying, we laughed over the silly little things we had done together. I used to look at the letter and let sadness overcome me, but now, I look at the letter and fight to keep laughter within me. It's all very funny, how we all used to be impulsive, and fought fiercely for our beliefs.

Here's the letter, drafted by Class Clown2 - Xuguang. Speaking of whom, I really miss miss miss him.

Dear mam,

We are writing this letter to you regarding the unsuccessful appeal of one of our classmates, Rajesh Kumar. A student with good linguistic and leadership skills, Raj has not only proved to be a source of inspiration for the class and a responsible GP rep, but most importantly, a worthy student of TJ.

Raj attains a good balance between work and interest, firmness and friendship. In his studies, Raj demonstrates concern and conscientiousness. He is aware of his own learning and looks for ways to improve himself with every given opportunity. Being classmates for the past three months, we certainly know the importance of his presence. His spontaneousity has made the class a very lively one and his enthusiasm has helped bonded us as a class.

As you know, CG 25/04 is one of the few classes that is very participative towards the college functions such as the Chinese New Year carnival( by setting up stall), 2nd Orientation( as an OGL) and Raj has been integral to the class committee. He’s always there to give his classmates support when they are down and his witty humour liven up the class in times of boredom. In secondary school, Raj was also the Vice President of the student council. This shows that he’s a good team player as well as a fantastic planner. Raj’s innate goodness and sense of service are his admirable qualities.

Yours sincerely,

CG 25/04

You can see our desperation/innocence/stupidity from this letter:
1. Rajesh Kumar - His name is NOT Rajesh Kumar. I forgot how Xuguang thought his full name was Rajesh. It's funny because we'd been friends for 3 months then, and XG didn't even know his actual name.

2. Raj has... proved to be... a responsible GP rep - Everyone knows that's not a valid reason to convince the principal to let him stay. You got to be like, National Champ or something.

3. As you know, CG 25/04 is one of the few classes that is very participative towards the college functions such as the Chinese New Year carnival( by setting up stall), 2nd Orientation( as an OGL) - If you must know, EVERY class participated during Chinese New Year Carnival and 2nd Orientation. Just not all of the students, but definitely at least one from each class.

Anyway, I brought this up because.. I miss my ex-classmates. Bah.

Imagine my horror, when I opened my bag and realized that I forgot my clock.

I'm pretty superstitious, when it comes to 'lucky' practices. I wash my hands when I'm having bad luck. I try to wear red underwear for mahjong sessions. So yesterday, when I got this naggy feeling after I finished my paper, I knew it was because of the clock.

And stupid forgetful, absent-minded me left it everywhere else but in my bag.

I've never walked out of an examination hall feeling the way I did today. Not dejected, not disappointed, not worried. Just desperation - I was clawing desperately at Hope. Begging Hope to pass me. And uncertainty.. normally you know it when you fail. Today, I couldn't even tell if that was a Pass or Fail paper. *screams into pillow*

By the way, I saw another ex-classmate today. Yeah, she was invigilating me too. What's up with the invigilators.. why are they all turning out to be my friends?

The world is so weird because I don't have my clock.

Half an hour before my first paper, I was hit by exam anxiety.

Symptoms:
- Heart starts hammering against your ribcage
- Butterflies in your stomach morph into big fat moths
- You start flipping through your notes, but you're not reading a single word of it

Ah Hao, my study partner noticed it and asked me, incredulously, "Are you nervous?"

You see, I've always been the more confident and calmer person between the both of us. When he freaks out, I always there to remind him to relax. I'm always cooking up excuses for us to take breaks.

“Yeah,” I snapped, while he laughed. “Think of something you comfort yourself with at this point of time.”

I thought of something cheery. “90% of these people haven’t studied, and I belong to the 10% who have!”

“Aaaandddd, I’m one of the 60% who will do better than you!” He chirped in. I hate, hate, hate my friend!

***

The examination hall was HUGE. It seemed like an endless hall with neatly arranged tables and chairs. I was at Row 52, and I loved where I was seated. Not too far back to feel intimidated by the whole mass of people in front of me, and not to front to be daunted by the tons of invigilators in front.

My table was exactly the way I love my study table to be. Spacious and wooden. I forgot my clock (I know, my name spells N-E-R-D) otherwise everything would have been perfect.

I saw Charmaine from my JC class. No, she wasn't there as my fellow candidate. My ex-classmate was there to be my invigilator! I was really amused.

Anyway, the paper was fine. I don't have very high hopes though. It must be the clock! I need my clock to be there. My lucky clocky charm. All nerds need their clocks and now that I'm one, I have to put it in my bag ASAP so my second paper can go ultra smoothly tomorrow.

I'm having this thing for blues right now.

So. It's Susan Tedeschi for you.

Enjoy!

Random Pic:
One night in KL

I'm hooked on Grey's Anatomy! I know, it's a little late to be hooked, but I just like catching series until they've matured into a couple of seasons or so.

I hate Meredith's obsession with McDreamy. Which brings me to a new topic: McDreamy.

I'm sure most of us have a soft spot for particular people. Especially those we subconsciously place between the friend and lover cateogory.

Let's just name him/her .. McDreamy.

Now... the thing is, McDreamy is always hovering between the two, never settling for one place, even though you two may have a mutual attraction.

You and McDreamy never got it on because:

1. McDreamy just wants to hover between friend and lover because it's comfortable.
2. The timing was all wrong. When you were attached, McDreamy was attached, and vice versa.

or maybe...

3. You guys had a fling, but something went wrong.

But when McDreamy appears all over again, even though you know you won't fall for him/her again, you realise that McDreamy is still hovering between friend and lover cateogory. And should McDreamy ask for a favour, you'd go all out to fulfil it.

The thing about dating a McDreamy is, something's bound to go wrong. I know it firsthand, because I dated my McDreamy, and it went horribly, terribly wrong.

This is why I hate Meredith's obsession with McDreamy. Because I know she's going to get hurt and she's inviting herself to get hurt. She knows it.

So here's my theory.

McDreamys are nice to see, nice to hold. But once sold, considered broken.

... 5 more days to the exam.

I should be anxious and flustered, but I'm not. I desperately need a panic attack to scare myself into burying my head in books!

How, how, did I convince myself that 3 days is all I need to pass a whole syllabus of Sociology? I'm mad, I absolutely am.

I don't even have the heart to count down to the end of exams, because I know I don't deserve the fun when I didn't put my heart and soul into this. Hmph. Serves me right.