Tuesday, February 21, 2006

I was listening ear and comforter of the day to a friend who poured out her relationship woes.
For the first time, I didn't offer any advice, because I didn't have any -- I didn't know how to.

Her plight reminded me alot about myself, how deluded I was and how oblivious I was to everything other than the fact that I could not lose him.
I thought I knew the opposite sex far more than my peers did, but I was the one thrown off tracks instead.
So, for the first time, I could only listen.

Anyway. She's caught in a dilemma; choose to hold on to the last strand of rope and risk hurting herself or end it now while the wound is still fresh? Either way, she stands to lose.

Which brought me to ponder over these two words :
Fate, and Choice.

Choice is the mechanism that enables me to control my life, change it, and causes it to be different.
Choice IS freedom.
We all have the choice to change what we can change, and that's the beauty of choosing.
But there's a limit to what we can change by exercise of choice. It doesn't prevent the poor from starving, it hasn't eradicated pain and suffering, and doesn't stop hurricanes from forming.

She has only 2 choices -- none of which, I feel, are appealing to her in her current situation.
Either way, both her decisions will lead her to a huge change in life. I would personally prefer her to break up with her current boyfriend and nip things in the bud while she still can.
But I could empathize with her reasons not to, so what are we now, spoilt for choice?
Ha. ha. ha.

Sometimes I wonder if it would be better if we had our lives decided by fate.
If everything was decided for us, that this road would be our destiny.

I wouldn't have to worry about finding a husband. Because it's already decided for me whether I'd have one, and who he'd be.
Instant solution.

That's why sometimes I think I wouldn't mind living in Pakistan, or any religion dominated country or city with strict caste systems.
Everything would be decided for me by my parents, I would just accept it as my fate.

Then we wouldn't be muddled by decisions that plague our lives constantly.

What about you? What would you choose, Fate or Choice?


  1. Wen..

    wah.. ur post very philosophy ! *clap*

    IMO, I will choose choice.. even if both choices will hurt me, at least it's my decision and I won't regret and will move on.. wounds will heal.. but with fate.. i can't even do or decide or control anything for my life, it's depressing..

  2. actually , everything is a choice , even to bow down to fate is your choice. you choose to follow fate and not make a choice. So, isn't that a choice too ? Life is all about choices , especially those you regret. Only thru that can one learn.

  3. The terminology for negative choices is "caught between a rock and a hard place" or "caught between the devil and the deep blue sea".

    I hate choices too, so I can understand you and your friend. I hate having to make choices because I always make the wrong one. O_o And I tend to always procrastinate until the choice is made for me by default, if possible. :P